I am a giant pain in the rear to live with and I marvel that my husband has continued to hang around for over 12 years. Perhaps he’ll stick around for 64 more.
When he asked for my help packaging an item he needed to ship out, I told him I’d be happy to assist after the kids were asleep.
We put the little ones to bed and set about finishing up the usual day’s chores: straighten the living room, start the dishwasher, pre-load sippy cups with milk for the morning. Standard tasks done, I waited for him to finish the dishes so I could help him with the box. I’m not a patient person. My impatience is visible no matter how hard I try to disguise it.
Hubby looked over at me from the sink, “Oh, you’re ready now?”
“It’s fine. Take your time.” I told him, using my most sincere voice.
“You don’t mean that. Let’s do it now. It’s like Halley’s Comet, I don’t want to miss it.”
Startled, I said, “What do you mean, ‘Halley’s Comet’?”
“I mean it only happens every 76 years or something that you have spare time in the evening.”
I was stunned, and he is absolutely and indisputably right, which is a pity because I’d really like to deny it. He wasn’t angry, although maybe he should have been. It was stated fact and nothing else. The evenings, like this one, are often spent catching up on email, …ahem… blogging, playing video games, studying, or working remotely. And if I’m not somehow tied up on an electronic device, I’m likely not home.
That isn’t to say that he is 100% engaged all the time either. If he isn’t attached to his laptop, or phone, or outside working on his car, he’s probably not home.
I’m not complaining. It’s all very equitable. I just can’t help wondering if it isn’t somehow wrong. I love my technology. I do. My iPhone connects me to the universe. I check it often. Really often. Too often? I mean, just because I check it in the middle of the night if I happen to wake up, doesn’t necessarily mean there’s a problem.
Just in case, I’m scaling back.
Don’t worry, the blog, the email, etc will carry on as usual, just perhaps a little more slowly. I’m starting with small manageable things like leaving my cell phone upstairs and out of earshot from dinner time forward, and wearing a watch when I go out so that I don’t have to handle my phone to see the time (which becomes a legitimate excuse to check for messages while I’m at it. That’s reasonable, isn’t it?).
So far, so good.
The point is (of course there’s a point, I just prefer the scenic route) that I don’t often make an effort to connect with people, at least not in a human way (face to face, telephone, smoke signals), but I’m going to start trying… so, if I show up unexpected and uninvited on your doorstep, you’ll know why. (I’m mostly talking to my husband here, I would never show up at someone’s house spontaneously, and since he and I live in the same house, I can hardly be considered uninvited. Regardless, I should hang out with him more often.)