Excedrin and a Sippy Cup

I was getting a mammoth headache, as I often do, and reached for my Excedrin. I realize that I don’t have a drink, and there isn’t a handy way to get one, at least not quickly.  I’m in a public children’s play area, there are kids everywhere and I don’t dare put the pills in my pocket or anywhere else until a drink is available, lest the pills manage to fall into the hands of some little person.  So I did the only thing a mommy can do, I washed them down with Bear’s sippy cup of milk.

I wondered briefly if any of the other mommies saw, and what they must have thought.  First I rifle through my purse for an unmarked pill bottle, anxiously dig through the contents to find the right ones, not antacid, not acetaminophen, not the multivitamin.  Upon finding the pharmaceutical gold, I look around somewhat anxiously for a drink before draining half of my son’s milk.

Headache relief forthcoming, I relaxed and watched the kids play, but wondered if anyone called child services about the slightly crazed pill-popping mama.

The Cosmic Hula Hoop

Being widely considered quirky (“quirky” is so much sunnier than eccentric or weird) has advantages. I occasionally find random gifts on my desk from people who saw this or that oddball thingamajig and thought that I’d just love it… whatever it is…. And they are usually right.

Recently when I opened my office door, I discovered, to my giddy delight, a beat up, hot pink Cosmic Hula Hoop on my desk. I cannot see a hula hoop without immediately saying, “You know, for kids.” (From the movie: The Hudsucker Proxy)

After my Tim Robbins impression, I grabbed the hula and shook it to see if the lights still worked. One of three lights is still functional. Better than none. And then… I gave it a whirl.

I don’t think it completed one revolution before it hit the floor, but naturally that one brief revolution was long enough for a coworker to spot me. I probably should be embarrassed, but it was just too hilarious. I tried again and again but just could not get into a hula-groove.

So I started asking every person I saw to take a crack at it. Some declined, but some are pretty gifted hula-hoopers. Who knew? Who knew so many people could be crammed into a small office with a hula hoop and come out without injuries?

I have photographed the victims…er… Participants for display at the upcoming office holiday party. Muahahaha.

I really do work, it’s not all play, but sometimes it’s a stressful place and that hula hoop has an amazing uplifting effect on people.  Whether they actually try it or not, even the most somber people can’t help but grin when asked to give it a go.

I even got the phone repair man to do it, but I promised him I wouldn’t post the pictures on the internet and I’ll stay true to my word…. But it was most definitely hilarious.

If the article below is any indicator, it’s good exercise as well as being good fun. 🙂

Maybe they should remake The Hudsucker Proxy and change the line to, “You know, for burned out adults.”

Party 1- Recap

Make that an extremely brief recap because the party itself, although nicely done (says the organizer: me), wasn’t all that exciting.

Here’s the pic, and yes, my bedroom really is that cluttered and really is that yellow.  I’ll get around to reorganizing it one of these days, but usually by the time I get to bed at night I just don’t care what a mess it is.  The pic is not very good, apologies.  Hubby did not have much patience for my camera.  I’ll try to get a better one at Party 2 on the 18th.

From the eyelashes files: I’m still amazed that people don’t know they’re fake unless I tell them.  Here’s to amazing eyes (Yup, that’s my big ‘ol eye in her photo album, you figure out which one) with no fuss.  Would it be wrong to start telling people I was born with them?

Back to the party: For a party full of hubby’s employees, of whom I’ve previously met maybe 6, there was something about the red dress and trimmings, the champagne (probably had a lot to do with the champagne) and the fact that I organized that shin-dig that made me feel a bit like I owned the place.  I’m not very outgoing in a room full of strangers, generally, but I think I chatted up almost every guest.

I did NOT fall down.  I can’t promise that I walked gracefully, but I did manage to stay upright the entire night.  By the end of the evening, I was done with those shoes.

For the next party, I’m putting a pair of slippers in my bag so that when I’m done being fabulous I can ditch the shoes and be comfortable.  The next party will also include a hula hoop and there’s no way I can hoop in those heels.

Bringing Sexy Back

I was in Target a couple of weeks ago with my kid posse, when Buddy asked what we were there to buy.

Before I could get the words, “diapers, wipes, snow boots and Exedrin” out of my mouth, I spotted this red dress out of the corner of my eye.

“Well, Buddy, maybe we’re here to buy mama a new dress.”

And so I bought it.  A red dress with a black lace overlay, that is completely not me and that has absolutely no utility, because where on earth am I going to go in this ridiculous red dress?  The office holiday parties.  Mine and my husband’s.  That’s where I’ll wear it.  And I don’t give a hoot if it’s inappropriate.

I started trolling zappos.com for red shoes because I don’t own any and I have such crazy wide hobbit feet that I can’t just pick up shoes for at a random department store.

And I found them.  Not just any red shoes, mind you.  But red shoes with 3.5″ heels.  Okay, some of you just snickered.  Anything over 1.5″ is high for me.  I’m not even sure if I can walk in them, but I’ll wear them, even if my hubby has to carry me into and out of the parties (the first of which, his, is tomorrow night).

So I started thinking… I’ve got the dress, I’ve got the shoes… hmmmmm….. How can I kick it up a notch?

I know! I know! I know!

Wouldn’t it be cool if, in addition to the red dress and insane heels, I got some eyelash extensions, too?

And so I did.  I grabbed a friend and headed over to Ginger Lashes where a friend of mine has set up shop specializing in this new fangled take on false eyelashes.  It took a while to get them applied.  For reals.  She glues individual falsies to your real lashes.  But holy carp.  These suckers nearly hit my eyebrows they are so long.  And all this time I thought celebs just had better mascara than I do.  I’m on to you, people!

Lash Extensions

One eye done, one eye to go!

Tomorrow night, I’ll be rockin’ my sassy dress, crazy shoes, and glam lashes, instead of the yoga pants, sneakers and pony tail that have become my mommy uniform.  I may fall off my heels, and sprain an ankle, but hey, the bigger the embarrassment the better the blog fodder.